Finding Relief From Depression During College
Katrina H, NeuroStar Patient Advocate
Statesboro, GA
Living With Depression From a Young Age
I became depressed in middle school, around the same time I started puberty and gained access to social media. Looking back, it feels like I spent much of my adolescence carrying around a heaviness I couldn’t escape.
By high school, my depression and anxiety were affecting almost every part of my life. Some mornings I would wake up crying and beg my mom not to make me go to school. There were times I walked through the halls with tears running down my face.
Like many people struggling with depression, I tried several antidepressant medications over the years. Unfortunately, some made me feel emotionally numb, while others caused brain fog. Over time, it became exhausting to keep trying medications that either didn’t work or came with unwanted side effects.
Depression as a College Student
When I left for college, my depression followed me. During my freshman year, I isolated myself almost completely. I rarely left my dorm room and only made a couple of friends the entire year.
During my sophomore year, I found myself in one of the worst battles with depression I had ever experienced.
No matter what was happening around me, I felt overwhelmingly sad all the time. My heart felt heavy every waking moment, and even happy experiences felt difficult to enjoy. I continued withdrawing from people and embraced unhealthy coping habits.
At that point, I knew I couldn’t keep living that way and began to wonder if I was experiencing what many people call treatment-resistant depression.
Learning About TMS for Depression
I first heard about NeuroStar TMS when my psychiatrist asked whether I would be interested in trying a non-invasive treatment option for depression.
At first, I was skeptical.
I worried about what it might do to my brain or whether it would somehow change my personality. Depression had been part of my life for so long that I almost didn’t know who I would be without it.
But my family was incredibly supportive and encouraging throughout the process. Deep down, I knew I needed to try something different.
What My NeuroStar TMS Experience Was Like
I completed my NeuroStar TMS treatments during the summer so I could better manage the daily appointments around my college schedule.
One of the most meaningful parts of the experience was the support I received during treatment. My TMS technician, Mary, became someone I genuinely looked forward to seeing every day. Because we were close in age, I felt comfortable talking with her, and she helped make the process feel much less intimidating. We would talk about life or TV shows, which made the time pass very quickly.
I even occasionally brought my roommate or friends to treatment so they could see how I was prioritizing my mental health.
Noticing the Impact
As treatment progressed, I slowly started noticing changes in myself. Toward the end of treatment, my family noticed it, too.
During a July 4th family gathering, several family members commented that I seemed lighter and more present. For the first time in a long time, I felt calmer and more at ease with life.
The challenges of returning to college for my junior year suddenly felt manageable instead of overwhelming. I no longer felt like I wanted to hide away from the world or sleep through my life.
How NeuroStar TMS Changed My Life
Today, I can confidently say that getting NeuroStar TMS was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made for my wellbeing.
It’s been almost a year since my final treatment session, and my outlook on life has continued to improve. Of course, I still have difficult days sometimes — everyone does — but something deeper changed for me through this experience.
“TMS helped me find joy in life again.”
My mind is no longer in a constant state of turmoil and emotional pain. I don’t feel like I’m carrying a heavy weight everywhere I go anymore. I’m able to enjoy moments as they happen and find peace even during difficult seasons.
TMS didn’t magically make life perfect, but it gave me the stability and clarity I needed to truly begin healing and growing into the person I wanted to become.
For years, I searched for the desire to get better. NeuroStar TMS helped give me that back.
My Advice to Anyone Considering TMS
If you’re struggling with depression and wondering whether TMS could help, my advice is simple: do it.
“I genuinely wish I had done it sooner.”
Trying something new can feel scary, especially when you’ve been battling depression for a long time. But for me, NeuroStar TMS became the turning point that helped me move forward and start living my life again.
For the first time in years, I feel like I’m fully participating in my life instead of watching it pass me by. I’m enjoying my college classes, have three roommates, and am participating in hobbies like painting, working out, and reading.
